Charles Pierce Crushes William ‘The Bloody’ Kristol

photo of William Kristol
That’s MISTER Monstrous, Bloodthirsty Fraud to YOU, Pal.

The indispensable Charles P. Pierce of Esquire magazine (and Idiot America) fame apparently reads The Weakly Standard (so we don’t have to). Lord knows I wouldn’t otherwise have caught this bit of warmongering slaver from William Kristol (of PNAC and various other war cheerleading efforts) “fame,” because I simply do not read Kristol. There just isn’t any need for a thinking person to do so, Kristol’s position is always: bombs away!

If you’ve somehow managed to live such a charmed life that you’ve never encountered Kristol’s dry-yet-vivid, clenched-jawed, Niedermeyeresque exhortations of the martial virtues and are thus unsure what I’m talking about, go read his mercifully short war-drum banging on Ukraine (one assumes, though Kristol never actually gets around to specifically mentioning the tensions in Crimea, opting instead for a whiny-sounding screed regarding our nation’s general lack of enthusiasm for most war). It will give you a basis upon which to appreciate the consumptive loathing in Pierce’s reply. Here’s just the opening sentence:

Blow me, you monstrous, bloodthirsty fraud, you silly, stupid chickenhawk motherfker who plays army man with the children of people who are so much better than you are, and who would feed innocent civilians in lands you will never visit into your own personal meatgrinder to service your semi-annual martial erection.

As Atrios used to say: heh, indeedy.